Who do you spend the most time with?

I would say myself. This is because I used to believe I was a different person compared to now, with a different personality, goal, battles, luggages, interests and talents. It took me a whole lot of dedication to finding myself, knowing why this feels comfortable, why this drains me, why boundaries needed to be in place, why I would rather stare into the wall all day thahn sit in a groupie.

Before now, I wouldn’t mind sitting in the crowd and feel uncomfortable if I’m not noticed, you just had to because I have a pretty good sense of humor, mu voice is natural loud, I have this killer smile, it was just it. I handled the attention pretty well, but I always felt used, tired, pressured because even on my worst days I felt I had the responsibility to make people happy, comfortable, at the expense of my sanity.

However things took a drast turn when I sat down and made the decision to put me first. It was me. My sanity. My comfortability. My time. My money. My effort. My decisions. My boundaries. My call. I would let no one have that rein over me anymore. I needed to take charge.

I begun the self discovery journey with my therapist/mentor and it has been all the way up from there. Yes there were setbacks, reluctance, denial, discomfort but I was determined to find out who I really was because it felt like I was operating someone else’s life. I even at one point went through a depressing stage for a couple of months because it was really had to come to terms with the fact that I was an introvert, I mean I used to be the life of the party but I just had to accept it, and then figuring out I was an empath. It was like another tough battle on its own. I read books,joined seminars, looked up those who have walked the same path as mine and I drew my strength from.

So yes, I will spend most time with myself because I am always learning about myself and I believe now is the time to put in the effort and lay the foundation for the succes yet to come.

Shalom

List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?

I’m big on book and love to get lost in the world created between thise pages, it’s not the 100th time. Reading is a culture I adapted for myself several years back to tickle my fantasy on romcom and crime drama, however, this culture opened my eyes to the greater beyond and has really influenced my vocabulary, creativity and lifestyle. So you see there’s a list of impact from book reading 🙂

This book is everything it says it is and more. It’s approach to life and more than a sack full of life coping advices on self discoveries, boundaries, relationships etc. It made me question my decisions to certain situations, it made me question myself, it helped shape my approach to life and living. It’s the one books I picked up out of due diligence and never regretted making that lazy effort. And I totally recommend to everyone and anyone who cares to ask or listen to my talk about on and on.

You want to know about yourself? More than just temperament but how to understand yourself and live with the “idiots” you’re surrounded by, then you need to read this book. It’s highly recommended for those who are on the path of self discovery and self acceptance. I mean I got to understand why I get bored easily by conversations on time and also how to carry on a conveso well. You see the contrasting discoveries? Honestly it made me embrace the introvert I am, how to deal with it and how understand people around me. Trust me I need it, because of my job I have no choice but to be around people at all times. So if you

This book beats me everytime I read it. I’ve read it thrice and for every time, I get a different understanding. It explains the reckless unending love of God for us, despite our flaws and imperfection. It’s an imperfect perfect story between a Prophet, Hosea, in the Bible and an harlot God told him was his wife. It transcends me everytime that the plan God has for us may look so impossible or out of this world but it’s the best. Hosea was so gentle, soft, patient, and he waited on God for everytime his wife went back to her vomit. I can go on and on. This book reminded of the love of God for us, he sees our struggles, he has the best plans for us, and especially for those who needs love, he sends us the loveliest person than our terrible exes 😅 I’ll read this book again, open minded, so I can have sweet fresh tears 😅

Digital Detox: back to reality

How do you know when it’s time to unplug? What do you do to make it happen?

In this present time where everyone is always on their screen, connected to net and always having something to do, it’s okay to say if I say it is our addiction. I’m always with my phone, on my phone, or on the system to edit, blog, design, learn or work at the hospital. We’ll be deceiving ourselves if we say it’s that easy to unplug.

There have been a couple of times I have struggled with the aftermath of constant digital life infused to my already unbalanced life, like poor sleep, trouble falling asleep, nagging urge to always pick up the phone, phone anxiety, constant use of phone daily etc. It was not the life I wanted so, I did something I learnt from a movie. DIGITAL DETOX.

I know when it’s time to unplug/detox when

  • I find out, I’m beginning to get a little too dependent on my gadgets. Now this is when I know I can do a couple of things without using tech, but find myself using it.
  • I find myself spending more time on my phone that I do with people in the actual world. Yes I am an introvert and don’t like to engage in long conversation or even talk at all sometimes, but I could drop my phone and just observe for a couple of minutes or so.
  • Health wise, I get the strain at the back of my neck and in my eyes. It’s the main reason I took a break from reading on my phone until my glasses are ready.

This is not necessarily all it entails, but from my POV, this is what it looks like.

How I allow my digital detox to happen is simply putting the phone and every gadgets away.

  • I map out activities that has to do with very minimal or no contact with the gadgets like a simple conversation with family and friend(s).
  • Make use of paperback. Read physical books and writing in journal/diary/to-do/sermon notes.
  • A simple activity like sitting and taking in my environment, the sunset, observing the people around me. It’s so serene and beautiful.
  • Make little memories such as cooking with friends or siblings, taking evening walks, exercising, cooking, karaoke with friends, playing physical games like chess, scrabble, monopoly etc.

Really it takes little to no effort to unplug and reconnect with nature, people and life itself for a moment or two. You can decide how long you want it to go and how to make use of the time.

Sleep. The most important and easiest way to unplug.

What quality do you value most in a friend?

I have amazing friendships of 8, 5 and 4years respectively and I can tell you, I do not even need them to be perfect, neither do they need me to be either, but what we expect of ourselves is empathy. The humane trait of our imperfection as humans that enables us to be conscious of our feelings. Now this does not mean we hold out the truth or lose touch with reality at some point. No, we put ourselves first and appreciate our differences when addressing various topics and situations.

Empathy; irrespective of our differences, every adult should be empathic despite the situation. We should be able to communicate with empathy even if you want to be “blunt”, because that’s the excuse people have for speaking their mind in such a callous manner. You can be blunt and still be conscious of the other person’s feeling.

One who is empathic is also supportive, because they understand how you feel and are able to meet you at some place to have your back.

An empathic friend is also kind. They are considerate and would not make selfish decisions or inconsiderate request(sl.

An empathic friend who is supportive and kind is also loyal. You know they stand with you despite all odds, you know that have your back even in your absence.

I value empathy so much in individuals because I believe it’s our side of consciousness that makes us human and reminds us to be humane even when the circumstances may not reflect. However, I believe one must have gotten to some level of self realization and growth to be able to understand empathy, and how it works, and even to be able to use it in handling our relationships.

What jobs have you had?

I would not say every job I’ve worked fall under under the same description, but something like that.

After high-school, before college, I worked in a small scale financial company when I had my gap year of 2years. It wasn’t fun because I didn’t like the constant contact with people, I was always tired and most times wanted to be alone, away from the constant exposure to sunlight, always talking and money issues. Money and it’s calculation was a no-no because I somehow always found myself in money trouble or some sort.

In college of nursing, I developed my writing skills. I did a lot of content writing, business writing, medical writing, resumé, grants application letters, report writing, ghost writing, supporting statements, letters, I developed and expanded my writing range. It was amazing and paid off 😁

While in school, I did some volunteer work in the hospital across all units and I did get paid for it cause it progressed from volunteering to a side job for financial support.

Finished from college, I’ve had nursing jobs back to back and some writing gigs too 😁

What are you good at?

My creative sense is always heightened. I just need the right motivation to start, because once I do, I’m not stopping till I finish. I can sit down and map out contents, either for myself or someone to write, record, or basically ideas on any topic. I’ll give credit to my overthinking habit and introverted personality because they go hand-in-hand in with aiding my creativity.

Several times I’ve mapped out contents from start to finish for months or weeks ahead and doen the whole work and research and editing in a couple of hours. Side effect? I’m always thirsty for knowledge 😂 Sometimes last year, I played around with my blog’s website, designed from start to finish, added features and all. A friend of mine saw the work and gave me a designing course on Udemy to go through. As usual, I went through with it and boom! I never stopped learning, designing, researching and it made me fall in love with blogging more.

Anything that has to do with unlocking the creativity part of us. Count me in 😌

Menstrual Hygiene day: Making menstruation a normal fact of life by 2030

Today, millions of women and girls* around the world are stigmatized, excluded and discriminated against simply because they menstraute. Period taboos and stigma still persist today, causing severe negative consequences on women and girls, health, education, income earning opportunities and on gender equality overall.

Menstrual Hygiene Day is celebrated on the 28th of May every year to highlight the importance of menstrual care, and raise awareness about the issues faced by those who don’t have access to sanitary products. This is a movement of more than 900 organization working together to create a world where no one is held back because they menstruate by 2030. Also, MH day:

  • breaks the silence, raise awareness and changes negative social norms around menstruation,
  • engages decision makers to increase the political priority and catalyze action for MH, at global, national and local levels.
  • raise awareness about the challenges regarding access to menstrual products, education about menstruation and period-friendly sanitation facilities.

Add your voice to the MH Day campaign using the Menstruation Bracelet

Created by MH Day, the Menstruation Bracelet is a global symbol for menstruation. The bracelet consists of 28 elements, five of the elements are red. 28 stands for the average length of the cycle, five for the average length of a period.

By wearing the bracelet, you’ll show that periods are nothing to hide, start conversations about menstruation and help push back taboos and stigma, one bracelet at a time.

Adding your voice to this campaign couldn’t be easier! All you need to do is share a photo of yourself online featuring a digital menstruation bracelet.

Join the campaign

To participate in the 2023 Menstrual Hygiene Day, use the hashtag in all your posts, tweets, TikToks and stories accross all social media platform

#WeAreCommitted

#MHDay2023

#EndPeriodStigma

PeriodEducationForAll

Tag MH Day social channels: @menstrualhygieneday(Instagram and Facebook) @mhday28may(Twitter)

References

menstrualhygieneday.org

TEENSMATA Youth Hub

*not everyone who menstruates identifies as a woman and not all women menstruate.

Is there a resolution?

It’s a new year here and I’m in between writing a list to tick off or just do my thing sporadically. I do the latter so often, but in the last couple of months I have been able to sit down and plan. Like proper planning and strategies on contents and I have followed them to the T. Actually it’s only 97% true but who’s pushing? 😏

Anyways, I do have a resolution. Yes I do! Now this tine it doesn’t sound cliche like you expect or think, let’s just say it’s a battle I hope to win and get over with. PROCASTINATION! If you’re looking for a former, grand procrastinator, look no further because she used to be me. It was so bad, it affected my diet, cost me some little gigs here and there, affected my finances but I didn’t need a preacher to tell me that I needed to change my ways. So here is how I’m doing it.

If you’ve read my previous posts, you’ll know I’m obsessed with planning. So I pen down every of my activities and space them out. I started first with not making them time bound, however, I realized I really needed to be discipline. So I added a time frame to it. And then spaced out the activities so I don’t get overwhelmed on time or have the “there’s so much to do” whinning. And that was it!

I hope this little TED talk of mine didn’t bore you, but rather encouraged and reminded you that it’s okay to go slow, take breaks, plan and not go accordingly, plan and go accordingly, get tired and want more time.

A bentoit